He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
She even gives head with a lisp.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
