I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
