sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
so much tequila, so little girl.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
