Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
