Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
