you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
