But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
