So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
