I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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