Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
