we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
a search helicopter?!
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize