"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
