I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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