What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
