I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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