? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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