Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
