I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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