??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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