its not stalking. its research.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
