Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
