I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
At least life still wants to fuck me.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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