Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
smell my finger.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
