I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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