he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
