Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
