The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
