I wish i was in the wii world.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize