you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She told me I should be a condom model.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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