The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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