how hairy? two words: wookie tits
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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