i think my tv is drunk
You work out of a Hotel?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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