At least make sure they are 18
Why
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
My feet surprised me
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