Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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