Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Your cock deserves a montage
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
