dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
