did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
