Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Randomize
