I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
