And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
