if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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