And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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