got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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