Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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