she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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