His pubic hair was longer than his dick
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
