you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
