Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
