Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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