she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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