I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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