just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize